Haha, "Herpes Zoster"

Wow, it's been a busy week. What with working on the BA, the LSAT, the gym, and my imminent guests, I'm actually running out of time to do things. Also my job is really busy.

Big sister Bekah has shingles.

The Olympics, the media, and the election are all infuriating me right now.

Birthday 2: This time, it's parental.

My parents drove for an hour, distracting me by forcing me to explain why Barack Obama's lack of legislative experience is an asset and not a setback, until I realized they had taken me to the zoo.

Huh. I guess they really DO know me. Then they gave me lots of money for Saturday.

Oh god oh god oh god

it hurts

"I like you,

Pranks," said noted friend-of-Ross-and-Brawler-Fred. "Not as much as Ross likes you, but, you know, I'm comfortable with where we are in our relationship."

Last night, Ross' crew called me up as I was at the gym and informed that a local bar had 25-cent wings. I wasn't sure what this had to do with me, until they made it clear that I was to come with them. So, Ross' friends are awesome.

So awesome, in fact, that they are taking me out tonight as part of a wacky birthday barhopping session. I am unsure of the wisdom of this, as my robot brain is still shaking off the effects of last night.

Stella-fueled dreams included one in which William and I were taking a small child to Disney World. For whatever reason, Dixie was absolutely ga-ga about collecting autographs from all the mascots. He actually jumped off a roller coaster when he saw Goofy. "Goofy," he cried, as he fell, "I LOOOOOOOOOVE YOU."

--

Oh, man, my workplace ROCKS. They brought me a cake and made a huge fuss, and my boss even opened a bottle of wine with me. Um...is it bad if my drinking starts at 3:30 and continues until midnight?

They even told me not to come in tomorrow, but I'm saving my holidays for when I go home and when Ross & Co. visit.

What a Gas!

Today, my apartment tried to kill me.

In the shower, I was alarmed by a beeping noise. (Hey, that pun wasn't even on purpose.) After trekking downstairs, I was told that my carbon monoxide detector was merely out of batteries. I was still suspicious, so I took the full batteries out of my Wiimote and put them in the detector. Sure enough, the beeping continued.

I was beginning to feel uneasy. I went back downstairs and insisted on talking to the super. After much bantering with the desk clerk, who was still convinced I was making BIG STINKS for nothing, the super discovered that my treacherous, treacherous gas cooker had ill-intent. Instead of delicious food, it tried to serve me a hearty portion of INVISIBLE DEATH.

I was saved only by my Wii and my wits. Batman would be proud.

Addendum

Some of my dear readers felt that yesterday's escapade merited further explanation. I will do so quickly, as I have a tale of Death Defying Daring to get to.

1) No complaints from the downstairs neighbors so far. And who are you, pyrozpsfksdapf? Are you Ross or Bob?

2) Well, it's like this: I was on the phone, pacing, as is my wont, and suddenly the bathroom was covered in water. Police reports indicate "He should have turned the faucet off."

Who has two thumbs

and used them to accidentally flood his bathroom floor while trying to wash his socks?

...THIS GUY.

I had a plan. I had a plan, and it was a clever one. It costs me seven dollars to do my laundry each week. I am going home on Friday. If I dry clean two of my nice shirts, I can do my laundry at home. All I have to do is wash my socks in the sink.

Simple, right?

My bathroom was covered in an inch of water, and I was out of paper towels, so I rushed to K-Mart to buy some. When I came back the water was mysteriously gone.

I'm not going to ask any questions.